Thursday, April 26, 2007

Jack Speaks and I Laugh



Recent things Jack has said to crack me up:


The cat taught me how to lick myself.


You're hurting my shadow!


I am trying to sleep but when I close my eyes, they keep popping open!

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Do Not Attack Issej

This weekend has been exciting, just knowing we're about to move into a new place. It seems strange that we're doing all this without Donn. People must assume that I'm divorced or never married, a young thing struggling to get by with her two illegitmate children. Donn gave me instructions to tell everyone that he would be living there too, but I think people might notice that no man actually materialized on the premises. Really, I have a husband! He lives here with me!! We're a happy family!!!!!! I know he's just worried about our safety (in our dangerous town of 308 farmers and 1 convenience store owner) and I can be irresponsible about those things.

My Grandma gave me the tip that I should put our phone under Donn's name in the phone book, so no one assumes I am a woman living alone, ready to be attacked. Or I could always do what one person I know did and spell my name backwards in the phone book. His name was Don and on the caller ID we were always wondering who the heck Nod was.

I have oodles of help for this move and it's nice! I feel spoiled to have so many people around who are obligated to help me because we're all dangling from the branches of the same family tree. I love it! I can call someone up and say, "Hello cousin (or uncle, second-cousin, biological father, great aunt, not-so-great aunt), have you noticed that our DNA has many similarities? I'm calling to cash in on that."

Friday, April 20, 2007

The Life Neurotic

I keep intending to write a great post and in doing so, I put off writing one until I have an idea that makes me laugh, cry, or scream somewhat severely, or preferably do all three in quick succession, and that great post never comes. Alas, you are stuck here reading my unplanned and poorly pieced together ramble that will probably be about love/life/birth/rebirth/death/loss/coffee/destruction/bodily functions of small children - basically, just a day like any other.

To catch you up to where we are now:

1. Husband flew across the ocean from the swampy, alligator strewn waters of southern Georgia to the dust spewing land in the Middle East, where people are blowing up all over the place.

2. Packed up the children, and two fish, and cat, and crown of thorns plant (who rode comfortably in the passenger seat) to make the trip from nice, temperate Georgia to the icy land known as Minnesota just in time for the lowest temps on record in about 7 years followed by the biggest snowstorm in 15 years...followed by another snowstorm in APRIL. Cheer up you say? Look on the bright side?

3. Husband is still alive. (Dramatic, I know)

4. Son went through various changes to become much more difficult to handle. Simply giving him the wrong color cup could cause him to turn green, bust out of his clothes, and tear the countertop off while shrieking, "MEET MY DEMANDS!!!!! ARRRRGGGG!!!!"

5. Found out husband will not be gone for one year from January, when he left, but he has been extended and will be gone until one year from NOW!

6. Life at Grandma's house didn't go so well and in about a week we are moving into a new apartment, while ALL of our furniture is in storage in Georgia. So far I have managed to gather beds and a kitchen table. The rest I plan to create using cardboard, duct tape, empty toilet paper rolls, saran wrap, and my imagination.

I'm actually really looking forward to moving into an apartment. It's not really an apartment, but more of a duplex. It will be a great area for the boys to play outside and make some friends (that they will hopefully not tie up and beat with sticks). It's kind of in the country, in a really small town with a population of just a few hundred. We'll be only a couple miles from the bike trail that we like to ride on and only about a mile more to the state park where we go "hiking" (as much as you are able to hike with someone who's legs are only about a foot and a half long). The only problem will be the furniture. Need to buy some. Cheap. Or steal some from Grandma.