Saturday, July 18, 2009

It was a beautiful, sunny day...

The wooden bench outside looked so inviting, the giant pregnant woman couldn't resist. She waddled over and sat down. Then she realized she could probably lay down on the bench and put her feet up and it would be awesome. So she did. She was laying on her back with her feet up and from that angle the sun was so blindingly bright she couldn't open her eyes. About 10 seconds later, she felt something going on with her back. It gave out. She tried rolling herself one way or the other, but it was not happening. She was stuck on her back like a giant dying bug. After contemplating just giving up and taking a nap, she started calling for her oldest son to bring his strapping self over and yank her up into a seated position. But alas he was on the swing and didn't want to give it up or his annoying little brother would take his spot. And that would be unacceptable. So his mother continued to call him and wiggle her arms and legs uselessly like a helpless overturned turtle, while he continued to guard the swing. Finally he came over and as soon as the woman saw him she burst out laughing like a lunatic. She laughed so hard that tears came streaming down her face and the sun was slowly blinding her, so she couldn't see. While her children looked on, not sure if they should laugh or call the funny farm, she managed to sputter out that she was stuck and could someone please pull her up. It took about 5 seconds for them to haul her up and she was sitting on the bench like a normal person again, but the woman couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if she would have been home alone that day.

1 comment:

Aunt Becky said...

I don't mean to laugh, but this was freaking hilarious.